Powerless with a powerpoint

I had written this blog 4 years ago and today one of my friend reminded me of this blog to me. So, re sharing it on WordPress .

 

All the facts and incidents in the present context are true to the best of my knowledge and any relevance with anyone living or dead is purely coincidental.
The inaugural speech in 3 idiots forced me to jot down my own experience few days back.
Our dept. was celebrating the 40 years of the foundation,and the chief guest was Mrs. Meenakshi Gopinath , principal of LSR. I myself volunteered for the inaugural speech and the introduction of the guest to the audience.
I had one day to prepare ,which seemed more then enough to me, as in engineering I already had many one night battle situations in exams, so I was taking everything in the light banter and was cool enough with all the proceedings, in fact was poking my nose into other people’s matter too rather then cramming the speech.
Next day was beautiful,I dint know that it was beautiful for the crows too and they will virtually devour me after the day.
S P Jain Audi was full,with all the dignitaries,guests,teachers and some lazybones students like me.
I began my speech, after the introduction  I asked for lights to be off and switched on the projector and started my power point slide showing the lifetime achievements ,her contribution for the society and blah blah blah……..
It ended well and got a nice applause for the speech and the guest too was welcomed whole heatedly by all.
but the very next moment the scene took a phase shift of one hundred and eighty degrees, as I was descending down the stairs of the backstage, I saw Voldemort……!!!!!
I saw 2 of my profs. which were not less then Voldemort in their appearance, and the way they were pursing their lips,crooking their nose,they seemed more hideous to me as if the Greek goddess Aphrodite was hibernating somewhere when she created them . Here I was feeling pity for their spouses and was wishing them luck for their next lives I heard a tussle in cacophony and I heard my name too.
The very moment I was taken by arm ,man she had a nice grip, which must have been implicit for her demonic body frame.
what the heck??!!why the hell is she wasting her time in teaching electromagnetic theory to losers like us,she better need some career counselling, India is already way far behind in women grappling ,she can be a good coach,or might be a player too!! Seriously..
She came near to me and hissed like a snake .oh ! I was choked by her bad breathe.
Ewww!!!!!!
At this very moment I started hating the canteen guy ‘anna’ for using too much onion and garlic in his dosa and other delicacies.
Being in those thoughts,I was literally dragged from the backstage into the empty room adjacent to the colossal audi, thanx to my lean frame and the hostel food on which I was thriving for past 4 years.
HOW DARE YOU??? Came a voice behind me….
Rather then looking behind I thought ‘WOW!! I dared’…’that’s quite an achievement’..
Here I was celebrating my achievement , another demon landed in front of me,as he was waiting for me to be slaughtered.
HOW DARE YOU???
Don’t u have a bit of courtesy that somebody has agreed to mark her presence on this special occasion and you are such a scum that you are presenting her on the power point slides.
‘but sir, I spoke for few minutes too!!’
another devil snarled,Which college has awarded you the graduation degree?
‘What type of school prepares material like you which lacks common sense’?
I answered them back in my heart.
they continued with their castigating and denigrating remarks and I was turning a deaf ear to them, and the first time in my life I wished for the earthquakes.
I forgot the name of the land god,if there is any,as I wanted a massive movement of earth plates the very moment.but as usually! it didnt occur !!
While they were blabbering this and that and shooting their metaphoric spears on me I started thinking of all the abuses I had learned throughout my life. Suddenly a very old word for swearing came to my mind,and I started to dissect its meaning. a faint smile appeared on my face.
‘LOOK AT HIM!! NO BLOODY REGRET ON HIS FACE!
YOU WILL SEE FOR SURE.’ cried the Voldemort and HOD together
I tried to fit the curve of my lips according to the situation,but it seemed to be more uncanny and jeopardized the whole scene.
I cursed myself with different hexes for volunteering.
‘YOU ARE PRESENTING A LIVE HUMAN BEING ON A COMPUTER.’
At this moment I got myself another line for the essay ‘technology:a boon or a bane’.
I started hating the lady too,who had assumed her so called BENIGN presence to this devil house.So what she has done so much social work or got a padamshree award for her.
It doesn’t matter to me anyhow.her graceful aura tuned a pandemonium to me.
The barking of profs. went on for few more minutes and then I realized again that I am still living in a free and a democratic nation.
I skipped classes for 1-2 days and after resuming them I sat on the back benches.
Although I have always been the back bencher,but now I got a solid reason for my stance.Earlier excuses included I  have demo phobia or the chalk dust has made me asthmatic and so on.
Days ,weeks,months passed and so did my experience of that day until a week back I checked my mail box and saw a mail with a subject ‘thank you for your speech’.I read it quickly she had mentioned that she was not offended by the way I used the dais for my speech and it was a new way of doing it and she expressed gratitude over my words of encouragement as they meant a lot to her.
Voila!! ‘Sense of encouragement??? Did I encouraged her?’
‘I don’t remember exactly’.
Let it be!!
I read the mail twice. and smile appeared on my face,but this time not any prof. was present to force some curve fitting of my lips.

PS   Its not any happy ending.The profs. have continued to see me with their evil eye which surely has  magnified under the extra large glasses they use and I have got another reason for my 3 ‘E’ and 1 ‘ C’ grade in the examination.

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